A farmer came home late one night and caught a travelling salesman in bed with his wife. The farmer knocked the travelling salesman cold and when he came to, he discovered himself in the barn, where the farmer had tightly clamped his penis in a big vice, nailed to the bench, and the handle to the vice was gone!
Looking around, he saw the farmer was sharpening a large knife. "Ye gods, you're not going to cut it off!" cried the salesman. "No," said the farmer; "You can do that yourself while I'm setting the barn on fire!"
