Before & After Love
BEFORE - You take my breath away.
AFTER - I feel like I'm suffocating.
BEFORE - Twice a night.
AFTER - Twice a month.
BEFORE - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation.
AFTER - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.
BEFORE - Don't stop.
AFTER - Don't start.
BEFORE - We agree on everything.
AFTER - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?
BEFORE - Charming and Noble.
AFTER - Chernobyl.
BEFORE - Idol.
AFTER - Idle.
BEFORE - I love a woman with curves.
AFTER - I never said you were fat.
BEFORE - He's completely lost without me.
AFTER - Why won't he ever ask for directions?
BEFORE - Time stood still.
AFTER - This relationship is going nowhere.
BEFORE - You look so seductive in black.
AFTER - Your clothes are so depressing.
BEFORE - Oysters.
AFTER - Fishsticks.
BEFORE - I can hardly believe we found each other.
AFTER - I can't believe I ended up with someone like you.
BEFORE - Passion.
AFTER - Ration.
BEFORE - Once upon a time.
AFTER - The end.
1. Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
2. A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
3. Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't
know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
4. A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
BEFORE - You take my breath away.
AFTER - I feel like I'm suffocating.
BEFORE - Twice a night.
AFTER - Twice a month.
BEFORE - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation.
AFTER - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.
BEFORE - Don't stop.
AFTER - Don't start.
BEFORE - We agree on everything.
AFTER - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?
BEFORE - Charming and Noble.
AFTER - Chernobyl.
BEFORE - Idol.
AFTER - Idle.
BEFORE - I love a woman with curves.
AFTER - I never said you were fat.
BEFORE - He's completely lost without me.
AFTER - Why won't he ever ask for directions?
BEFORE - Time stood still.
AFTER - This relationship is going nowhere.
BEFORE - You look so seductive in black.
AFTER - Your clothes are so depressing.
BEFORE - Oysters.
AFTER - Fishsticks.
BEFORE - I can hardly believe we found each other.
AFTER - I can't believe I ended up with someone like you.
BEFORE - Passion.
AFTER - Ration.
BEFORE - Once upon a time.
AFTER - The end.
1. Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
2. A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
3. Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't
know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
4. A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
