A drunk advised the clerk that he wanted to buy a bra for his wife.
Clerk: Here are several styles to choose from, sir.
Drunk: This one will do the job!
Clerk: Do you know the size that your wife requires,sir?
Drunk: 7 1/2
Clerk: I'm sorry, sir, but bras are not made in that size. Here is a standard listing of mamufacturer's sizes. Perhaps you can pick from those.
Drunk: 7 1/2.
Clerk: There is some mistake. Let me bring in our buyer to help.
Drunk: 'Measured it myself! Size is 7 1/2!!
Clerk: But, sir--
Drunk: 7 1/2, God dammit !!!
Clerk: Perhaps you can tell me how you measured? What did you use?
Drunk: My hat!
