SCOTTISH JOKES

Two brothers, both Scots, named Jock and Sandy, go into business together. At the end of the first year they try to balance their account books, but were $9.50 short. They tried again and again, but no matter which way they tried to do it, they always came out $9.50 short.
"Tell me the truth, Sandy," asked Jock, "Are you keeping a woman on the side?"

SCOTTISH JOKES

McTavish, on a free trip to the pokies, had spent the entire two dollars he had brought along without winning a cent.
Thoroughly disgusted, he stalked off to visit the gents and discovered that he needed 20 cents to use one of the cubicles.
A man standing nearby gave him the necessary coin, but just as McTavish was about to use it he spotted someone leaving, so he grabbed the door before it slammed shut and got in for free.
And so, with a spare 20 cents to spend, he returned to the machines and had a final fling.
And wouldn't you know it? He scored the $10,000 jackpot!
McTavish was ecstatic. "If it hadnae been for yon laddie I'd no ha' won," he exclaimed, "The mon deserves to be rewarded - I'll give him his twenty cents back.